Saturday, June 30, 2012

Quote for Creatives

This blog started out as somewhat encouraging to those who read it.  It seems like I have since been using this as a forum to complain, which is so not what I want this to be.  I blame the Prednisone, haha!  Legal crack, remember?  It's as bad as drunk-dialing!

Anyway, I thought with school ending that I would write more.  That really hasn't been the case, so then I just post whatever craziness is in my head because I am clueless as to what I want to write about.  Totally clueless, but I came across this quote I just love.  Those of you who are writers (or creative for that matter) will love it, too:

“If you want to write, if you want to create, you must be the most sublime fool that God ever turned out and sent rambling. You must write every single day of your life. You must read dreadful dumb books and glorious books, and let them wrestle in beautiful fights inside your head, vulgar one moment, brilliant the next. You must lurk in libraries and climb the stacks like ladders to sniff books like perfumes and wear books like hats upon your crazy heads. I wish you a wrestling match with your Creative Muse that will last a lifetime. I wish craziness and foolishness and madness upon you. May you live with hysteria, and out of it make fine stories - science fiction or otherwise. Which finally means, may you be in love every day for the next 20,000 days. And out of that love, remake a world.”
~ Ray Bradbury
Nuff said.

Wednesday, June 27, 2012

The Education System, Fat-Free Creamer & Crack

I've made my first pot of coffee in a long time this morning.  I'm somewhat perturbed as I sip my coffee with FAT-FREE creamer.  This stuff does not taste good.  It's almost as bad as buying fat-free cream cheese or fat-free salad dressing, but for the record, I made the mistake of going to Getto-Eagle here in the North Side instead of driving the hike up McKnight Road.  They are either out of everything or they've stocked their shelves different this week than they did last week.  I know better than to go there for anything more than bananas and as I sip this nasty coffee, I think I might remember in the future.

Up at about 4:15am, I popped some prednisone and lay in bed snuggling with the furry child until it worked it's magic (the prednisone, not the furry child).  For those of you who aren't familiar with prednisone, I call it "legal crack" and I mean that from the bottom of my heart.  If you don't believe me, you should have seen me organizing my tupperware cabinets by 5:00am.  I'm sure I don't need coffee today, but it seemed like a good thing to do while I emptied the dishwasher and reorganized the pantry.  Haha, just kidding.  I didn't reorganize the whole pantry.  Just a couple of shelves.

So as I write this, I contemplate the Facebook thing.  No one understands why I cancelled my account on there (except my crazy Aunt P), and truly, I'm not sure what I should do.  Facebook under my writing pen name is no fun because I only have like, two friends on there.  Haha, kidding again.  I think I might be up to five or six people now...

(Sighing.)  So, the few people that even give a shit have text messaged me as to why they can't find me on Facebook anymore.  Then I have to explain the story (clearly, they aren't reading my blog - you know who you are).  In this day and age, the idea of cancelling your social media in any capacity is like "she must be on crack!"  (Hmmmm...)

I'm just still irritated about people running to my boss about stuff I post.  I mean, seriously, what are we, in junior high again?  I'm a thirty $#-year old woman who has a mind.  A damn good one if the 3.87 GPA I just graduated with has anything to say about it.  I live in the North Side, I mentor teen girls stuck in the foster care system, CLEARLY I'm going to have an opinion about the lack of life-education our children receive.  My dear friend, Loleda, has started an amazing program at our church for kids around about the junior high age.  These kids will receive the training and experience they need to one day go out in the real world and get a job without having to ask the HR person how to fill out the forms.  THAT is my point.  That is my point in posting a comment about someone asking me a stupid question.  Parents really need to do more for their children today if they are ever going to succeed in the real world.

Anyway, if I choose to reactivate my Facebook account, I'll probably get in trouble again (or "talked to" again) about this blog or some post, but do I even care anymore?  I believe our education system is lacking and it isn't always the teachers who should be blamed.  I believe as an HR person, I'm going to see where some of these holes are and I can more passionately promote programs such as the one my dear friend has started.

And to whomever has a problem with my posts or my blogs, please delete yourself off of my friends list, especially since you lack the courage to do what Matthew 18:15 tells us to in God's Word.

Friday, June 22, 2012

Sigh, Whatever.

It has been a long, stressful week and I feel it.  Unable to sleep when inflammation rules it's ugly head, I'm awake but only halfway functioning.  Work has been so stressful this week and I see now how the effects of stress turn my body into a shaky, weak mess.  I've been so fatigued this week and angry about it.  Do you know I went to the grocery store and when I came out to my car afterwards, my car door was wide open.  I left my car door open!  My brain is so clouded with whatever disease my body is fighting and I am just angry about it!

I've been back on the prednisone (self-prescribed this time) because I can't stand not being able to function at a hundred percent.  When I'm on the prednisone is the only time I have enough energy to get through the work day, but I hate taking it.  I weened myself off it (yet again) like to doctors showed me, praying that this time would be for good.  But one week off of it, I am tired and weak and so sad about it. 

I've worked so hard to change my diet and get my rest and to think positive.  Touting "I'm not claiming whatever is going on with my body" and telling anyone who cares to listen that my goal is to be off at least four of the seven meds I take daily by Labor Day.  I'm studying Scripture, praying more not just for myself but mostly for others, gave up so many foods and drinks.  I've been back to church the last two weeks, taking the Treasures of Healthy Living bible study class (which I absolutely love and recommend).  I'm very strict with my time, staying home to rest so much more, yet I am tired today and the stress of work does not help.  Even as I type this, my arms and hands feel droopy and strained from the effort.  My mind, wide awake, my body still asleep.

Each day this week has been challenging, yet I say nothing at work because no longer do I want to voice those words.  But they are in my head and on my heart and I'm missing hours as it is because I've gotten up so late in the mornings.  Mornings just suck, my body dragging, my mind murky.  I contemplate missing work today, but my paid time off is already sparse and I paid $20 for a ticket to this evening's festivities.  I don't want to go, but I promised a friend we'd go together.  Okay, I practically begged her to be my date so I feel obligated, but I don't think I can do it.  I don't think I can do another evening in the heat (Tuesday, I had free tickets to the game and took one of my foster girls).

Anyway, I'm just done.  I'm just done. Whatever.

Sunday, June 17, 2012

My Hiatus from Thinking

It's been forever since I've posted.  My book review blog Beloved Books isn't any more active.  As much as I think about blogging and writing, I've been on hiatus from anything requiring me to actually use my brain.  I graduated on May 5th with a 3.87 GPA from Geneva College with a BS in Community Ministry.  For those of you non-Christians, it's kind of like Social Work for Christians.  :0)

Anyway, working full-time and taking classes part-time for the last 5 years took its toll on me and I have done a whole lot of nothing since graduation.  I've watched a ton of Netflix on my new Nook tablet, played tons of video games on my Android, and have managed to finish reading a couple of books (that I haven't blogged about because that requires thinking...).  Zeus is happy mom is home so much, although he has been caught giving the evil eye to my electronic devices.  When he isn't glaring at them, he's trying to lay on them or knock them out of my hand with his nose. 

It has all been perfect timing, however, because I've been up to my ears in summer staff hiring paperwork.  I think we've had about 50 new hires come on in the last month.  My title at work finally got changed from "Support Coordinator" which only managed to confuse people to "Human Resource Generalist."  I had to find a title that would include the many other projects passed on to me because HR is only a piece of my job (although a very large piece!).  So I have had to think since graduation, but anyone who works with me can probably tell I'm on this brain/thinking hiatus.  Normally the one who knows everything, follows up with everyone, and gets back to people right away, I am living in a fog.  People are actually having to follow up with me, which of course makes me feel like a big slacker.

I have kept up with my Healthy for Christ blog.  That also requires me to think because I'm usually researching whatever I write about for the week. 

Speaking of writing, I started attending a writing group that I'm SOOO excited about!  These people are
A.) Writers!  and
B.) Working writers! 
People that are actually published and continually working on getting published.  Like, some of them have even gotten paid and stuff (no joke)!  In Virginia, I wrote almost daily and hung out with writers, active writers, and it was really good for my flow, you know?  With school over, I needed something like that here.  I was apprehensive to find a writing group because let's face it: there are A LOT of weirdos out there that call themselves writers, but I am happy to say I love this group.  Making writing part of my daily life again is one of my goals for this summer. 

My other goal is to just focus on getting healthy again.  I really need to eat better and take better care of my body.  I am being treated for rheumatoid arthritis and fibromyalgia, but I claim neither of these diseases.  I'm in week two of a class called "Treasures of Healthy Living" and I couldn't be more excited about it.  This class is taking us through Scripture to show you how God wants us to be healthy.  He designed us to be healthy, He calls us to be healthy, and He has given us all the tools we need on this earth to be healthy.  The Bible is our instruction manual for being healthy, but as Christians, we never look at it that way.  So, I know I will learn a lot through this course and think I want to teach it next semester.  We'll see how it goes.  By Labor Day, I want to be off of at least 4 of the 7 prescriptions I take on a daily basis.  I want to get healthy again, and as I slowly come out of my brain/thinking hiatus, I hope to be writing about my health in the months to come.  :0)